Article I did with Daily Mail Health New York on my experience with Pain Hyperacusis.
Click the following link to check it out if you would like!.
Monday, March 4, 2024
Tuesday, February 27, 2024
Hyperacusis Story w / Patient Voice Canada
Just recently shared my Hyperacusis & Tinnitus Story w/ Patient Voice Canada.
Click the link to check it out if you would like!.
Hyperacusis & Tinnitus Interview & Day In The Life Mini Documentary / Globe & Mail Canada
An interview and day in the life documentary I did with the Globe and Mail / Canada in 2019 about Hyperacusis & Tinnitus.
Click the following link to check it out!.
Friday, December 15, 2023
It Strips You Of Everything / Right & Wrong Approaches To Help Treat Pain Hyperacusis
It Strips You Of Everything / Right & Wrong Approaches To Help Treat Pain Hyperacusis
First off, I am not a doctor, and I am not giving medical advice. I am speaking through my own personal experience, and other patients' experiences as well, that I know.
It strips you of everything you once had. Freedom, physically connecting with others, ability to take care of yourself - Cooking, cleaning, and sometimes not even being able to bathe because the sounds of running water are too hard to handle. When at a severe level, you cannot live alone, you need compassionate supportive help to do these everyday things, either in your home, or supports close to you for survival. If not, people may fail and get worse, there is no turning back, when at such severe levels with these auditory conditions, there are no limits, absolutely none, and this is what people do not understand who do not have these conditions, they destroy people's lives, and take everything away. In my five years of having them I have seen five people that I know commit suicide. Either because they had no supports, or they just couldn't bear the symptoms, or both, so it's no joke at all. These conditions need to be taken seriously, before more lives are taken. The ringing in the ears and head can get as loud at 130 dbs, and you cannot concentrate on anything, nothing, the loud piercing sounds take over, and there is no cure. The conditions strip you of your mental, spiritual, and emotional health and more. The conditions are invisible, and people who are not affected either do not believe they are real, or they do not think they are as bad as patients say. Who would want to isolate themselves from the world?, not wanting to work, not wanting to go outside, cook, clean, etc. It makes no logical sense for any human being to want to do these things. Humans are social creatures, and when connection is taken away, pretty much “Life” is taken away, as sound is everywhere. Who would not want to get Psychotherapy for mental health conditions to take care of themselves?. You usually have to speak to someone in office, or by telephone and the noise is to bothersome to frequently get help, it makes the afflictions worse. Who would not want to take medications for physical health problems?, most do not understand that most medications are ototoxic to the auditory system.
Pain Hyperacusis, and severe Tinnitus is no joke. It’s hard to take care of pre-existing health conditions, and anything new that arises when severe, or even at a mild level. Can’t go into the hospital if I break a leg or my arm, the cry of the baby, the sounds of the intercoms, the sounds of the ambulance sirens, can’t wait in the waiting room with so many other people as they make noise, and need to get a private room, and some establishments don’t offer private rooms. You tell the nurse you have Pain Hyperacusis and they have never heard of it, and you have to explain to them, and they still don’t get it. If you do break a bone in your body, you will most likely have to admit to the hospital, but it will be going to war with the world.
Just a few months ago I had a surgery in the hospital, needed to stay overnight for three days, and it was pulling teeth the whole time, even with the strongest painkillers on the planet that were given to me didn't help. One of the painkillers kept me up, and I did not sleep for thirty six hours, the other painkiller given to me instead ramped up my Tinnitus, and could not sleep because of that as well. Not to mention the nurses checking in on me every two hours. It was a nightmare, but I got through it. I honestly do not think I could ever do it again. There is no painkiller for me to take or medicine that can regenerate my hearing to do so. Even the strongest anti-anxiety medicines do not do the job, and actually make the conditions worse from taking them. Many people are scared to take medications that are given out by doctors ever so freely to try to treat these conditions, because they do not work. For most the pills make the problem worse from either the side effects, withdrawals coming off of them, or the medications eventually wear off. Even pills to treat other health conditions from my personal experiences and others I know as well, about eighty to ninety percent of them I / we have tried have made Hyperacusis & Tinnitus worse
If you ask most doctors on the planet if they have heard of hyperacusis, usually they have never heard of it. Some doctors will nod their heads and say “Yes”, but you can tell that they do not know at all. These so-called professionals will try to treat the afflictions as well, with pills and more pills, because they gain money from writing scripts. Some are compassionate and want to try to help, and they think it's treating “Anxiety” or “Depression”, it’s not the thing to do. Even most ENT / Neuro-otologist specialist doctors treat Hyperacusis & Tinnitus with pills as well. All in all, It’s the wrong approach, and so many patients are worse off now because of pills, it’s an exceedingly slippery slope to take them, and some patients have even seen "death".
Most online information is wrong from MD’s to treat Pain Hyperacusis and Tinnitus, sound therapy does not work and in most cases makes the problem worse, as the ears cannot handle any noise. The right approach for pain Hyperacusis is to protect with hearing protection (Ear Muffs & Ear Plugs), stay in silence and avoid most or all sounds, and to give everything time.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read.
So much love as always.
DV.
Friday, September 15, 2023
Community Art From The Heart
Community art from the heart is a new project series that is different and outside of the box, created by JD Rider & David Vance. We will be showcasing creative imagery of people in the community, and writings about them all in one, to hopefully help to lift people’s spirits, and others as well. Our first edition to the series is of Amelia from Ontario, Canada. A great writer, artist and more.
We hope you all enjoy!.
So much love as always!.
Next up we have, Travis. A man once on a beautiful life journey, but then some of life came crashing down on him, and landed him with severe Tinnitus & Hypercusis.
We love you Travis!.
Thirdly we have Kelly, she is strong in her faith, tough as nails, and has a big heart. JD Rider does this writing on this piece, and David Vance on the graphic. Thank you so much Kelly for being you, and for your kind and loving spirit, you help to make this world a better place!.
Up next we have Destinee!, she is a very special lady who does not give up and is always caring about others regardless of her circumstances, she keeps going NO MATTER WHAT!, and I believe she is a special inspiration to us all. Thank you Destinee for your continued love, your soul is exceedingly unique, and cannot be matched!. Keep being you, we love you!.
Next we have Breanne from Peterborough, Ontario, Canada. She is a 22 year old who has acquired Pain Hyperacusis at such an early age. Despite her illness, she still seems to be focused and motivated on her goals. Thank you for being you Breanne, thank you for helping to make this world a better place!.
Irene, from Italy, is a loving and compassionate soul, who seems to want the best for everyone. Her empathy and love, does not go un-noticed regardless of having Hyperacusis & Tinnitus. Thank you for being you!, Irene!.
Next is Justin Andreas, sadly Justin passed away not too long ago. He was such an energetic and vibrant soul, gave the world so much, and helped to make it a better place. We all miss you Justin, may you rest in eternal peace friend!.
Next we have the Co-Founder of Community Art From The Heart JD Rider. His compassion and love for others is beyond admirable, and a big inspiration to us all I believe in all areas, regardless of having Noxacusis and Tinnitus. Continue being awesome JD!.
This week, the creator of Community Art From the Heart is featured -- David Vance. This thoughtful piece showcases David's talents as a musician and also traces the bondage he's endured with tinnitus and hyperacusis. Much love to David from the piece's creator, J.D. Rider.
Saturday, September 2, 2023
The lost dreams of two sufferers, what could have been!.
David Vance
In January of 2017 I was at a high pinnacle in my life. I was working my dream job at a fantastic fine dining establishment serving mostly celebrities in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. I was living in a great beach apartment, my mental, physical, emotional & spiritual health were on top, and life was looking great. The seeds were planted, and I had more goals to accomplish. Meeting the lady of my dreams, starting a family etc.
In March of 2018, I noticed that my ears were sensitive to some sounds, from going back to work in the hospitality industry. The clanking of plates, silverware, and chatter in the restaurant started to become bothersome. I saw a few doctors and eventually one doctor diagnosed me with Hyperacusis which is extreme sensitivity to everyday sounds, and told me there was no cure for it. I didn’t believe him, and searched the internet as much as I could, and long and behold this man was right, and my dreams became smashed, and still to this day in 2024, five years later.
When I was healthy, and in my new apartment I envisioned myself soon landing the girl of my dreams, my soulmate, the lady who I could share so many similarities with, have similar goals, and trust to be my partner for the rest of my life. I believe I did meet her, and if I did not get sick, I most likely would be with her today. My plan was to move my soon to be lady friend into my apartment, become best friends, travel the world together, and do all of those fun things that couples do. Then later on to have children, a pet or a couple, purchase a house, also get married somewhere in between. Bond with our friends and their children, our families etc. But it seems that God had a different plan, or maybe the devil himself did, I do not know, it’s all a mystery. Dreams turned into nightmares. Something got in the way, and today, I am stuck sitting in my residence alone with extreme noise sensitivity, and any noise that aggravates my condition can potentially permanently worsen me, and also aggravate the extreme ringing and buzzing in my ears (Tinnitus). I started a medication called Clonazapam in 2021, and it helped for many months, and then it started to turn on me, making my symptoms worse, and to this day, I am still tapering off of the medication, and not getting any better (yet). I can't even express how debilitating these conditions get when at a seriously catastrophic level. The sounds of the 30 db air vent with ear plugs and ear muffs on becomes too much to handle, the sounds of washing dishes and cooking, even lightly hurts, lightly mopping and sweeping, and even the sounds of the bath water running, even more so with the shower water running down, even the sounds of walking with hearing protection on can cause pain so bad that is feels like a hot blade is stabbing you in the ears, even with 40 dbs of hearing protection on. I spoke to a friend about this, and he said that his aunt with stage 4 deadly cancer was even able to cook, so that tells you right there how debilitating and limiting severe Pain Hyperacusis & Tinnitus can get, and how limited someone can be. Then nobody believes you about how bad it is, and blames it on anxiety - Doctors, some friends, family etc. "You are getting off of anxiety medication, so it's reverse anxiety". The anxiety happens from sounds that cause the debilitating pain, and the sounds keep happening, so it's a never-ending cycle. It's hard to find someone to do everyday things for you, if you do not have a spouse or parents, basically a caregiver, and the caregiver can make noise too, so they have to be educated on how to quietly do things, which is another stress in itself. I am on disability and may have to inquire about getting a home helper very soon, and trying to deliver the right message to them about my limitations is stressful beyond. Severe Noxacusis & Tinnitus will not kill you, but it will drive people to suicide, and it's happened in the last few years with a few people, and we don't anymore deaths. When at severe levels, these conditions have no limits at all. Never in a million years did I envision the life that I have today, and I wish it on nobody.
I would have traveled to places such as New Zealand to see some of my favourite sites, especially where the Lord Of the Rings was shot. Go to London, England and experience the electronic music culture, that was my passion, and go to any places that my partner would love to experience as well. Places such as Mexico, Cuba, Florida, New York, LA, Dubai etc. Go to Michelin star restaurants around the world and experience different cuisines. Who knows where life would have taken us, and maybe we would have moved to a different country. Maybe I would have started working in a Michelin Restaurant etc. Have walks with my partner along the shores of Cuba, propose to her there, get married on a beach or on a cruise ship. Eventually purchase a cottage away from the city, to go to on weekends and holidays. But first purchase a house for our family, before all of this.
Have a couple of kids, and learn how to be a father, how to be a role model for a child. My partner and I learning how to raise a human being / beings in this world to be successful. To have these children bond with other children in our families, and more. Have some pets, maybe a couple of great dogs, to go along with our family, and all go for walks together. Go apple and strawberry picking. Go to amusement parks, the zoo. Family vacations around the world. See our children grow, and do exactly what my partner and I did as children, teenagers and young adults, and hopefully them do it better than us. My partner and I too grow old together, retire & move from the city to our family cottage, sell our house, or give it to one of our children.
When in our new home / cottage. Do things with each other, boating on the water, fishing, reading a lot, taking care of our home etc. Having the kids up whenever they would like, and any other of our family and friends.
But no, everything above that you have read got smashed from getting sick with severe Pain Hyperacusis & Tinnitus that has no cure. Maybe there is still some hope for me, I am not sure, I do not know what God has in store. I just know for a fact that building anything with anyone in terms of a partner physically is too hard, as I can’t even tolerate the sounds of people’s voices, and my own. This goes with making new "physical" friends as well.
I absolutely do not wish this devil illness, on nobody, not even my worst enemy, NEVER!.
Jerad Litton
Some say that man's greatest fear is dying. It's the final frontier into a realm where control is certainly not ours. Well, I worry about it, too, not because mortality, where Earth has passed away, but more because I'm truly scared of what will then await me -- after death, that is. You see, to dwell on death is absolutely horrifying. All these stories of Hell have taken shelter in our minds for decades and decades faithfully, and until that final moment -- when death descends upon us -- the truth is so elusive; the outcome like a riddle. Well, with extreme noxacusis, that's all changed for me.
Honestly, I'm ready for death, but only on God's terms. I hope He'll take me sooner rather than later since I'm battling with life as an incompatible vessel. As a young, triumphant man, I never thought I'd say this -- I always yearned to live. But nox destroys reality in every single way. Only those who know its hell can understand the pain. I do believe in Jesus, though -- that Heaven does await me, and those who choose Him truly. But despite that, I'm always so hard on myself. I always feel that I'm not worthy enough, even though I've asked for forgiveness on more occasions than I can count, even. Thus is the nature of OCD, I guess. It plays with my emotions. And nox is like the Devil now, adding to the fire.
Most will never know it, but something cruel inside the ears can bastardize reality and ruin life in every way: a beast called noxacusis. For those who sadly have it, they're walking on bedeviled grounds that most have never seen -- a battle with the universe and everything she stands for. Having nox is fatal, not for their mortality but quality-of-life. They're forced to hide from every sound -- any kind of sound. When nox is that severe, they don't have a choice. Blatant disobedience will cause their ears to worsen more.
Every noise -- big and small -- will conjure pain inside their ears, like flames or knives with violent force, every day and every night. And other hells will follow, too. Tinnitus is also a common problem with nox, a collection of phantom noises that often worsen, too, with every move they make. So it's super unrelenting. For the sake of their survival, obeying noxacusis -- their new, perverted master -- is absolutely crucial. It's not a choice at all. They're locked in steel chains. But nonetheless, it sadly reaps disaster, even with obedience. Sacrifice runs rampant, as life is fully nullified with sound that's everywhere. With severe nox, they lose ninety-nine percent of their precious life -- no exaggeration -- 'cause sound is just too sovereign.
It's super rare, though. It's so rare, in fact, that only a small facet of society will ever cross its path. As I said before, uncharted territories dominate their world -- fresh grounds that spite the creation itself. My estimation is generous, though, allowing one-hundred people for every million to have it. Though the number is likely much smaller than that, especially for severe levels of nox. In a city of one-million, for example, there are only two known cases of severe noxacusis -- myself and another individual in Columbus, Ohio. I'm part of communities that span the entire globe, and that trend is recurring in every corner of the world, where a couple per million are battling what I'm battling. Talk about bad luck.
My rational fear with nox is that the world won't care about its wrath and won't pursue a cure. What happens to us doesn't happen to people in the big scheme of things. As I said above, we're like one in a million or maybe two. Nox is so rare, in fact, that there's really a greater chance of being struck by lightning: one in fifteen-thousand according to the National Weather Service. So people won't worry about nox for the same reason -- the rarity. And you don't see people worrying about lightning either, do you? Well, there's your answer. They don't need to worry about either, because the possibility of either occurring is so slim that it doesn't warrant the need. For the people it does happen to, they're just written off as causalities in a world that's occasionally so tragic that it's beyond their grasp or measure.
But anyway, my name's J. D. -- a thirty-seven year old male with severe noxacusis. My loudness discomfort levels are so low that they're mostly in the teens. So as you can imagine, I feel pain to every sound and have to isolate. Even my own home is often not safe. That's how bad I am. And not only that ... I have severe tinnitus, too -- electrical and painful in how it feels daily. I'm trekking down a shaky path of mystery, tears, and broken dreams. It's totally egregious, and evil to its brittle core, as pain and awful suffering are always at the forefront -- a life of harsh uncertainty that's full of paradox; with loopholes in that mix, too, allowing my survival.
The loopholes are defiant. They're unrelenting bullies, breathing down my aching neck. They preside over every inch, every moment, every second of this hell. You see ... nox never kills you. And ultimately, that scathing loophole keeps the paradox alive, allowing sufferers to exist under the confines of hell and unimaginable duress. No matter how bad it gets, mortality is never on the plate. You'd think the body would finally give out at some point, via failures in the brain or central nervous system, but nope. Death is not a luxury. It kills us in every way except the fact we're breathing.
Since every sound is weaponized, it forces me to isolate and not engage with anything. I'm homebound like a prisoner. But as I said before, I don't have a choice. Choosing disobedience is not a real option. I'd worsen more and more and more, and have to die to end it all -- not 'cause nox would pull the plug, but more 'cause it would torture me and force me off the planet, as realms of hell and suffering would make life too unbearable. There is no cap to this. And I feel that suicide isn't an option for religious reasons.
My current state is so bad that my quality-of-life is one percent or so. While fighting, I'm also trying to preserve what little I have left. But it's winning, sadly. Nox has got the upper hand, even though I'm careful. Thing is, sound is everywhere in life. With severe nox, even tiny sounds are like a force to be reckoned with. So life becomes impossible in every single way, as sound is tied to everything, which carries poison everywhere. There's no way to escape it. The planet's inhospitable.
And as I said before, nox doesn't have a cap. It can always get worse. It's not like "Dante's Inferno" with nine circles of Hell. There are endless circles with nox. And no matter how bad it gets, it never kills a person. Though it does cause some to take their lives when things get too abysmal. The nature of nox is very cruel -- as cruel as cruel can be. It takes your life so viciously and everything you love, but leaves you here to see it. And the world doesn't care, as nox is super rare, which adds insult to injury. To convince outsiders that it's really real is a hard enough task, but to also realize that no treatments or cures are underway adds additional layers of jaded disparity to this journey.
I lost my life two years ago when I took a herb called turmeric. I had mild, stable nox and mild tinnitus. But now, both are very severe and I'm fighting to survive. Before this, I had big plans for the future. I was excelling at my job and a promotion was in the works. I was dating people. I envisioned a future where I'd someday be married and buy a house -- a world of prosperity. But everything is gone now: my job and opportunities; my hobbies and my car; and worse, my precious family.
Had I never taken turmeric, I'd likely be in Indianapolis, Indiana right now instead of Columbus, Ohio. My brother went to Indy to pursue a job in television broadcasting. We worked together for twenty years in different media jobs. An NBC hub was our longest collaboration for thirteen years. So I'm confident that I would've followed suit and joined him for work there. I might even be engaged or married by now. Who knows? I'd be enjoying car show circuits and summer dreams, soaking up the sun. I'd shop and go to movies, and dine at restaurants. I'd cherish people daily, having so much fun. I'd make the most of life, traveling and roaming. I've always wanted to go to Ireland to trace my family roots, too. And I've always wanted to rent a cabin in the woods, or a beach house that overlooks the ocean. I love Atlanta, Georgia, too. I've been there many times. So I'd likely go there for vacations as well.
However, my struggle with nox has allowed me to meet my amazing girlfriend, Patricia, who also has nox. So that is definitely a beautiful plus and I love her to pieces. If I could heal or improve dramatically, I'd marry her ASAP and start a life together. She's currently in California, though, so I'd likely go there unless we both healed. Maybe she would come here then. We're open to both ideas.
To be honest, I've always imagined my elderly years as positive journeys. I'd grow to be an old man with great fortune and bliss. The silver hair and wrinkles, too, would overtake my youth. I'd have my wife beside me, aging like a gem. Everything would shine. Having kids, however, always seemed unlikely, as I've been dealing with nox for so long. It crushed so many dreams; things that normal people take for granted, even. But I never dreamt that I'd be here -- this current situation, or undiluted hell, especially when I was so careful for twenty years. I've been battling nox and T since age seventeen. But they were mostly mild for twenty years. After three years, I recovered from a moderate state with super mild T and nox, but now I'm just the opposite -- severe's an understatement.
My current situation is so bad that I'm doing absolutely nothing to survive, because doing something -- anything, really -- causes setbacks or worsenings. Nox is the most evil thing ever. Even the most simple things cause problems. Bathing and brushing teeth even cause flares. A recent shower with double ear protection caused me to lose more tolerance. Now, even whispers hurt. What kind of madness is that? Even people in hospice care can bathe with help. Problem is, when you're completely allergic to sound in life, it introduces a paradox of seismic proportions. Every task requires noise.
If I don't improve or heal along the way, it puts into motion my worst fears: that I'm doomed to this atrocity for years and years to come; decades possibly. And I don't know how to do that, really. I take it one day at a time. It's an unbelievably daunting thought to know that there are forty or fifty more years of this in the works, with worsenings coming, too. Like, is that even possible? Can a human really endure that? I don't know. I just rely on Jesus to get me through each day. I'm a believer in Him.
Obviously, the idea that suffering should dominate life is not a pleasant one. No one wants that. But for me, the Earth is truly dead now, as the construct is ultimately poison for these failed ears. The beauty of my home is sadly dejected and replaced by misery. Life should be lavender fields, glowing sunsets, and nights of endless passion, as I gaze upon upon the boundless stars that rule this universe. I can't believe a vicious thing has robbed me of all that: this hell called noxacusis. I yearn to overcome it -- to get my precious life back.
Thank you to everyone for taking the time to read this article, it's well appreciated.
Hopefully it helped in any kind of way
So much love as always!.
DV.
Sunday, August 20, 2023
Connecticut Public Radio - NPR. Show on Hyperacusis - David Vance
Radio interview I did on Hyperacusis with Chion Wolf on NPR - Audacious
Click the following link to view if you would like. CC is included for everyone to watch!.
May we all heal one day, so much love as always!.
DV.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Daily Mail New York Article / Pain Hyperacusis / David Vance & Andrew Johnston
Article I did with Daily Mail Health New York on my experience with Pain Hyperacusis. Click the following link to check it out if you woul...
-
It Strips You Of Everything / Right & Wrong Approaches To Help Treat Pain Hyperacusis First off, I am not a doctor, and I am not givin... -
AN INVISIBLE ILLNESS. SEVERE CHRONIC PAIN CAUSED BY SOUND THAT AFFECTS THE EARS AND THE HEAD Ever wonder what people go through when deal...